Unpacking Old Stories
What are the stories you keep telling yourself and others over and over? Stories you can’t get past? Stories you keep reliving year after year, keeping you stuck from moving forward? In a recent workshop during a retreat, my fellow participants and I were asked to dig deep and unpack some of those old tales of woe. Then we were encouraged to make a decision to let them go.
To step back a bit, before I left for the retreat, I had a one-on-one call with my mentor and course/retreat creator. Through our conversation we discussed where I was struggling. During our call, she had me go through a series of questions to help understand where I was at in my transformational journey. I wasn’t surprised to reveal, I was living my life on the surface.
During coursework earlier in the year, I hadn’t allowed myself to dive much deeper than surface level or perhaps just a smidge or two below…….UGH. I made a mental note I would go back through each exercise, put pen to paper, and excavate those bits and pieces that I left somewhere in the corner or under the bed. Unfortunately, most of those emotions were still tucked in those hidden areas of my life.
Upon further excavation during the recent retreat, I discovered one of my truths that was disguised as something it wasn’t. It was in the form of a middle child, peace-maker and eternal optimist. For the most part, I’ve always been a positive person. I’m not claiming situations were always great, but I usually handled them through the eyes of it being okay, even when they weren’t.
I was afraid of letting go and showing my complete self for fear of not being fully loved, accepted, or seen. If I didn’t make waves or cause a fuss, I would be loved just as much as the others. So I stayed on the surface of being okay, even when things were hard. I wanted to protect myself from being hurt.
I’m a sensitive person, an empath and take on, as well as carry, the feelings of others. It’s something I’ve been working on understanding for a few years. As I work through my hidden areas, I’ll uncover and share more of the deeper me. There is a quote by Mark Groves that goes something like, “What have you been pretending not to know?” WOW…..so powerful.
What I’ve learned through this exercise is: it’s brave to let go of fear, it’s courageous to be vulnerable, it’s not weak to show your true emotions. I’m imperfectly perfect, just as I am. I refuse to let this take my power any longer. I’m unpacking old stories, replacing them with truth, and releasing the mud from my wings. What old stories are you still telling? It’s time to let them go.
xoxox…..Sheryl
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