Some Like it Hot
This past weekend I hurt myself and without a doubt, caused the chain reaction 100% from my state of being. I let my emotions take control of my mind, body and soul, and I am dedicating my post to the ugly facts. “Your beliefs, either positive or negative, helpful or hurtful, largely determine everything you do and how you do it” - Brian Tracy.
I am by nature a happy person and 99% of the time wake up in a fantastic mood. This past weekend, I woke up irritated. I had been creating a story in my mind. I had actually been spinning it for two weeks prior. The results of this little burst of negativity, and ultimately harmful consequences, reminded me how important it is to see things through a positive lens rather than a negative one.
Let me take you back to the beginning of my story. My son and daughter-in-law were opening their farm stand for only three weekends this year due to the arrival of their first born baby, and lack of time. Like last year, they planted pumpkins, gourds, squash and all things fall to provide to their customers. Last season they had so many pumpkins they didn’t know what to do with them, but this year’s crop was significantly smaller due to weather conditions.
When decorating for the fall, I always look for flatter pumpkins that stack vertically (larger to smaller). My son has always been good at helping me carry, de-stem, and get the perfect stacking and assorted color combination. Some of my favorite colors of pumpkins and squash last year included the bumpy sage green, snowy-white, and blushy-pink orange. I wanted something similar. However, due to the weather they didn’t have as much to choose from.
I saw the perfect pumpkins on day one. They were sitting on the wagon and I told Andrew which ones I wanted if they didn’t sell. He questioned if I really wanted them so early. Maybe waiting until later they would last longer. I agreed.
Between the first weekend and the second weekend, I slowly watched all the pumpkins I wanted leave the farm stand. UGH. At one point I mentioned I still wanted a flat white pumpkin and my son responded by telling me there was only one left in the field they hadn’t picked yet. So I claimed it.
In my mind I was getting irritated that I hadn’t gotten any pumpkins and all the ones I wanted were sold. Again, I was spinning that for whatever reason, my son didn’t want me to have any of the pumpkins. That’s where it all fell apart. Unfortunately, I let that little notion whirl.
On the third and last weekend, I was determined I would get my pumpkins before the farm stand opened. I had been coming early every weekend to help with the set-up process. I came in hot and irritated. When I arrived, Andrew wasn’t outside and I thought I’d get the pumpkins myself.
The wagon of pumpkins was already at the farm stand at the end of their very long driveway, but there was the overflow supply next to the garage. I spotted the flat white pumpkin, and in a feisty panic lifted it. It was very heavy and I had a bit of trouble carrying it to my vehicle. Once it was loaded I started looking for another flat, yet smaller pumpkin, and spotted what I thought was the perfect sized green smooth one. It wasn’t a bumpy one, but it would do. As I grabbed the pumpkin in a huff, I didn’t see the log below my feet and tripped and fell. As I was going down with this large and heavy object in my arms, all I could think of was “protect your knee.” I was living it in slow motion. I laid motionless on the ground for a few seconds until Barley, their golden retriever was on top of me.
I was hurt, but somehow managed to protect my knee. Since I was on the side of the garage, no one saw me go down besides the two dogs. I managed to get to my feet, turn the pumpkin over and noticed there was a big crack at the stem. Oh well, I didn’t want to waste a good pumpkin so I managed to get it to my vehicle even though I was in pain. Just then Andrew came out and mentioned I couldn’t have the green one. His wife wanted it and wouldn’t let him sell that particular one. Well, you can imagine my irritation surfacing again. This time, I stated, “You act like you don’t want me to have any pumpkins!” He was dumfounded and said, “What are you talking about?”
Since I couldn’t have the green pumpkin I curtly asked which one I could have. After realizing my irritation, he immediately started helping me select one, and brought it to my car. He started offering me as many pumpkins as I wanted, and was loading them into my vehicle even though I said it would be enough. Now I had more than I needed….haha.
In hindsight, I never should have let my mind go to places that weren’t true. I should have spoken my truth on the first day, and just picked the pumpkins I wanted. We think people can read our minds when in reality I should have communicated exactly what I wanted. That would have prevented me from curating a story that wasn’t true, and therefore would have kept me from hurting myself.
Some like it hot, and thrive on being angry, but I prefer to be happy and find joy. Perpetuating a story in my own head gets me in trouble every single time. Whether I’m negative or positive, that’s what I’ll attract. As a side note, I’m feeling blessed since my injuries could have been much worse, and I believe that green smooth pumpkin was my saving grace. It took the hit first and cushioned my blow. I invite you to exam the lens you’re looking through and determine if you’re creating any untruths. #blessed #lessonlearned
xoxox…..Sheryl
PS … Now, I have more pumpkins and gourds than I know what to do with….LOL. Andrew wanted to make sure I had plenty.