Mean Girl
I’ve been working on squashing the inner “mean girl” voice in my head that’s been lurking within most of my life. It’s the voice that told me time and again, “ I’m not enough; not smart enough, not skinny enough, not good enough, not organized enough, not wise enough,” and the list goes on. Actually, I would bet almost every one of us had or still has that secret inner bully, that’s alert and ready to pounce or unleash at any moment.
It’s the judge within our being that beats us up and fills our head with negative thoughts, and bullies us into self-sabotaging our decisions and choices. She’s also a pro at making us feel inferior to others. A confident and smart women can go from ten to zero in an instant if you let the inner mean girl win. She points out what we haven’t accomplished and won’t give a second glance to what we have tackled or created. She compares us to everyone else with unrealistic standards.
My mean girl shows up in perfectionism, fear, worry, overachievement, and avoidance. I’ve been working on catching her in the moment and facing her head on with my amour and sword drawn. The more I capture her or sense she’s approaching, the easier it is for me to claim victory in the moment.
For the men in the audience, you’ve got an inner critic and mean judge as well. It’s waiting to tear you down, beat you up and cause self-doubt in your decisions. Most of us let that inner mean girl or judge win, but I’m here to share there’s ways to combat the enemy. Before you get hijacked you may want to consider the following:
Start to notice when your inner mean girl or judge appears
Recognize you are being hijacked
Choose love instead of fear when you feel negative thoughts creeping in
Express gratitude for choosing love
Even though I’m starting to recognize and stand up to my mean girl, it’s usually in the reflection rather than the moment. I still feel this is a victory since I’m getting closer to capturing her when she first attacks. The more I learn how to defend against her lies, the easier it will get. I’m standing up to my mean girl and judge, will you join me in standing up to yours?
xoxox…..Sheryl
PS….Remember, the “mean girl” or “judge” is ALWAYS wrong.