Best Friend or Worst Enemy
“You can be your own best friend and worst enemy. Each moment you get to choose which one you empower,” - Milena Karanovic. I’m referring to the worst and best enemy of our mind. Our thoughts can either beat us down, or lift us up. We get to choose which one controls our life.
I was fortunate during the first year of covid to have the opportunity to be part of a training grant for coaches to learn and teach a way to build new neural pathways. A program that focused on the importance of mental fitness (which is our capacity to respond to life’s challenges with a positive rather than negative mindset). It was perfect timing.
We all have an inner critic (Judge) that constantly berates us, and tells us weren’t not good enough. However, we also have an inner wisdom (Sage) where every outcome or circumstance can be turned into a gift and opportunity.
The Judge lives in the limbic system/left brain and motivates us through negative emotions such as fear, stress, anger, guilt, and shame. Whereas the Sage lives in the empathy circuitry/right brain and motivates us through positive emotions such as empathy, curiosity, creativity, passion, and purpose. Although the Judge/Saboteur may generate success, it won’t create happiness. The Sage generates your highest and sustained joy.
Even though going through this program was just what I needed, little did I know it would have a profound impact on my relationships, specifically with my Mom. I often felt like an outsider in regard to our communication and my ability to measure up. I discovered it had nothing to do with her and everything to do with me. One part of the program taught me to look at myself and others through the eyes of a child, full of innocence and pure love.
We all go through big “T” and little “t” traumas in our lives (such as a death, bullying, or even an accident) that shape and form our views. When we were little our minds helped us cope the best way we knew how which carried over into our adult experiences.
By using my own childhood picture, I was able to see that beautiful child as whole and perfect. I was also able to see other’s through their innocence and perfect being by visualizing them as a child. It gave me a whole new perspective on any negative person or circumstance.
“You are your own best friend and worst enemy; only you can take yourself higher or make yourself fall even lower, “ - Dr. Prem Jagyasi. If you’re feeling pulled in a new direction and ready to commit to increasing your mental fitness, weaken your inner judge, strengthen your inner sage, change your story and love your life. I invite you to learn more about the program or try seeing others through their child eyes. Your mind can be your best friend or worst enemy; which will you choose?
xoxox…..Sheryl
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