Rewriting the Narrative

For as long as I can remember, there’s been a voice lurking in the corners of my mind, one that’s quick to judge, eager to criticize, and relentless in its whispers of “not enough.” Not smart enough. Not thin enough. Not accomplished enough. Not lovable enough. Just… not enough. Sound familiar?

I would bet that almost every one of us has experienced this inner critic, this secret bully that waits, alert and ready to pounce at the first sign of vulnerability. It’s the voice that compares us to others, magnifies our shortcomings, and conveniently ignores every single victory, no matter how big or small. It’s the perfectionist, the fear monger, the saboteur that holds us back from stepping fully into who we are meant to be.

Over the years, I’ve learned that my inner mean girl wears many disguises. She shows up as:

• Perfectionism – the belief that anything less than flawless isn’t good enough.

• Fear – the paralyzing doubt that keeps me from taking risks or stepping outside my comfort zone.

• Worry – the endless loop of “what ifs” that rob me of peace.

• Overachievement – the exhausting need to prove my worth through accomplishments.

• Avoidance – the subtle (or not-so-subtle) ways I shrink back instead of standing tall.

I used to let her run the show. I believed her words. I let her dictate my choices. But I’m not doing that anymore.

These days, I’m learning to meet my inner mean girl head-on, not with shame or self-judgment, but with awareness, compassion, and courage. I no longer let her hijack my thoughts without challenge. Instead, I’m practicing new ways to quiet her voice and reclaim my truth.

Here’s what’s been helping:

1. Recognizing the Pattern
   Awareness is the first step. The moment I catch myself slipping into self-doubt or comparison, I pause and ask: Whose voice is this? Is this really true? More often than not, I realize it’s just old programming, one that no longer serves me.

2. Rewriting the Narrative
   Instead of allowing the inner critic to dominate, I counter her words with kindness. When she says, You’ll never figure this out, I respond with, I’m learning and growing every day. When she says, You’re not enough, I remind myself, I am whole exactly as I am.

3. Choosing Love Over Fear
   Fear is the inner critic’s greatest weapon, but love is stronger. When negative thoughts creep in, I consciously choose love, love for myself, for my journey, and for the imperfect but beautiful way I am unfolding.

4. Practicing Gratitude
   Gratitude shifts everything. When I feel like I’m falling short, I pause and list a few things I appreciate. It’s amazing how quickly this simple practice silences self-doubt and brings me back to what truly matters.

5. Giving Myself Permission to Be Human
   Growth isn’t about eliminating the inner critic completely, it’s about learning to disarm her before she takes control. I still hear her sometimes, but now I see her for what she is: a reflection of past conditioning, and not my reality.

For the men reading this, don’t think you’re off the hook. You have an inner critic too, that voice that tells you you’re not successful enough, strong enough, capable enough. It’s the same enemy, just with different words.

But here’s the truth for all:

• That inner mean girl or judge? Is always wrong.

• You are already enough.

• You are already worthy.

• You are already whole.

So today, I’m rewriting the narrative and I invite you to stand with me and to recognize when the inner critic shows up and choose a different response. To replace judgment with kindness, fear with love and doubt with confidence. Because the more we silence the mean girl within, the more space we create for the voices that truly matter, the ones that lift us up, guide us forward, and remind us of the beautiful, powerful beings we are. Are you with me?

XO Sheryl

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