No Real Plans
This past Sunday marked another Father’s Day, and was a day that looked much different in years past. Usually, planning started a few weeks earlier with my family. Ideas and open calendars would be negotiated until we came to a consensus how the celebration would come together. Being surrounded by family made my Dad happiest, which was our ultimate goal. It’s only been six short, yet long months, since my Dad joined the heavenly ranks of those loved ones that went before him. Could it really be possible that I haven’t hugged, touched or kissed him in six months? It has, and I’m still feeling a little lost.
As the day approached, I tried to put it out of my head, hoping it would be like every other day, but it wasn’t. No calendars or ideas were mentioned and each family had plans of their own, to celebrate the Dads. My Mom and I would spend the day together. After all, it was her first Father’s Day without him as well.
We said a prayer over lunch that included all the special dads in our lives, past and present. My brother had gone to the cemetery earlier in the day and since we couldn’t coordinate, I had planned to go later. At first I wasn’t sure if my Mom would go; I figured it would be too painful, but she decided at the last minute to tag along.
With recent health issues, she wasn’t able to walk on the uneven ground, but I promised I would take her by car, to the far corner on the other side of the iron fence, which was connected by a church parking lot. As I made my way to his resting place, I was a bit nervous; it was the first time I’d been back since his passing. After looking around, I decided he had the nicest spot as far as I could see. He was on a hill, safely tucked in a corner, surrounded by grass, situated under two big oak trees, that would provide shade in the hot summer and protection from winter storms.
There isn’t a day that goes by I don’t think of him. You often see our family raise their glasses to the man that made such an impact on our lives. I look for signs of him everywhere, and often talk to him when I need advice, or want to tell him something. I laugh out loud at some of the wonderfully funny things we shared.
Although in years past, it was sometimes a struggle to coordinate everyone’s schedule, I know we would gladly have that back in a second. Even though this year there were no real plans, I’m guessing next year will be more of a celebration; when the pain has lessened. How do you celebrate your loved ones that passed? It makes a person realize that life is precious, and our time here on earth isn’t long.
xoxox…..Sheryl