A Different Kind of Valentine
February arrives draped in red and pink. Store windows sparkle with heart-shaped boxes, bouquets line the grocery aisles, and love songs find their way back onto every playlist. It’s easy to assume this month is about romance, chocolate, and candlelit dinners. But what if February held a quieter invitation? What if this month wasn’t only about loving someone else… but about remembering how to love you?
For many women, especially those of us in the second half of life, love has often meant giving. We’ve loved children, partners, friends, parents, neighbors, communities. We’ve shown up. We’ve poured out. We’ve sacrificed. And somewhere along the way, we may have left ourselves with the leftovers; not intentionally, not resentfully, just out of habit.
February gives us a gentle nudge to reconsider that pattern. Because the truth is this, loving yourself isn’t indulgent. It’s foundational. It’s the difference between giving from overflow versus giving from exhaustion. It’s the difference between saying yes from joy versus saying yes from obligation. It’s the difference between collapsing into bed depleted and laying your head down fulfilled. So how do we love ourselves in a way that feels real?
Let’s put a fresh spin on this month of love and speak to yourself like someone you cherish. Imagine speaking to your dearest friend the way you sometimes speak to yourself. Would you criticize her body? Question her worth? Rehash her mistakes? Probably not. Yet many of us do that daily in the quiet corners of our minds.
This month, notice your inner dialogue. When you catch self-criticism creeping in, gently replace it with compassion. Like: “I’m learning.” “I’m growing.” “I’m doing the best I can.” Love begins in the language we use with ourselves.
Take time this month to honor your energy. Love isn’t just words it’s also setting boundaries. Loving yourself may look like:
Leaving the gathering early when you’re tired
Saying no without over-explaining
Protecting your quiet mornings
Choosing rest over productivity
You don’t have to earn your worth through exhaustion. You are simply worthy because you exist.
February is not just about romantic love. It’s about remembering that you are worthy of your own tenderness. It’s about using the good china on an ordinary Tuesday. Buying yourself the flowers. Taking yourself on the walk. Forgiving yourself for the thing you’re still holding onto. It’s about placing your hand over your heart and recognizing that it has been faithfully beating for you all along.
We often wait for someone else to choose us. But what if we chose ourselves? What if loving ourselves deeply wasn’t selfish… but sacred? For the rest of this month, I invite you to ask yourself one gentle question each morning: “How can I love myself well today?” Let the answer be small. Let it be simple. Let it be yours.
Let this February reflect a different kind of Valentine. Because here’s what I know, when a woman truly loves herself, she becomes steadier, kinder, and clearer. She stops shrinking. She stops apologizing for taking up space. She begins making decisions from wholeness rather than fear. And that changes everything. You are worthy of deep, unwavering love. Sometimes it’s simply choosing yourself, again and again.
xo, Sheryl
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